Karkat and Dave have a goddamn troll-baby
by FreakoftheAngels
Summary: After a couple centuries, the players decide to have babies. Dave and Karkat are the last couple to join the ectobaby party after much consideration. The following is what happens afterward. Expect a little drama in the future.


"So," Dave mumbled under his breath, looking down at the napping bundle in his arms, "We really did this, huh? We used ectobiology to make a goddamn human-troll hybrid."

He was using his thumb to trace the outline of the new baby girl's sleeping face. She had fallen into a deep slumber shortly after being fed for the first time, only minutes after Roxy had helped create her earlier that evening.

Karkat scoffed and walked over to the bed where his husband sat, beaming at him. "Are you talking to yourself again or what, dumbass?" His husband chuckled. He didn't look up at him, but Karkat could see the goofyass grin on his face as he gazed upon the newborn. Karkat was amused by how unbelievably captivated he was. That Dave Strider, The Knight of Time, an almost-god who had helped lead civilizations and cultivate galaxies, was fascinated by such a small little thing.

"I just still can't believe it, Karkat." He hugged her closer to his chest, planting a soft kiss to her forehead. "We have a kid, a real fucking kid that we get to raise and love and shit. And she looks like us too, it's so awesome."

Karkat rolled his eyes. "Of course she does, idiot. She's genetically fifty percent you and fifty percent me. Why does that surprise you?" When he sat down on the bed next to him, Dave finally looked up and Karkat's heart skipped a beat. Dave wasn't wearing his shades, so Karkat could see how overjoyed he was through his eyes. As if the smile didn't make it obvious enough.

Dave shrugged in response to his question. "I don't know. I guess it's just something people make a fuss out of when they have a baby. Like, 'holy shit she has her mother's eyes!' or 'I think I see a bit of your brother in him!' kind of deal."

Karkat snorted at the thought of such a thing. "It's been about thirty thousand years since I first was exposed to human culture, and yet I continue to be amazed at the silly things you guys fawn over."

"Meh. I don't know. I mean, I think it's just nice, ya know? It's almost like proof. Proof that we made this little sucker. Like, anyone can look at her and be like, 'Oh yep that's Karkat and Dave's kid alright. Looks just like them."

Dave glanced down at the baby again. "Plus, like I said, I still can't comprehend that we have a daughter now. This is such a huge milestone in people's lives. Like holy fuck is this a big deal."

Karkat sighed and leaned against him, trying to get a better view of her sleeping face. "It's a big deal to me, too. Granted, my own species is inexperienced at handling wrigglers, but this is our little wriggler, right? That counts for something."

And Karkat meant it with every ounce of his existence. Much like the other trolls and humans, life had grown a bit dreary after the new generation of trolls took off, along with the humans who had survived Earth's near end. After a while, all they had to do was maintain the peace and be idolized by their followers and admirers. Nothing too difficult. It was only several centuries later that the option of parenthood became appealing. Children who they could raise as their own and share their life with. And they were the last couple to do this.

Dave turned to Karkat and held the baby out to him. "You can hold her, if you want. She's yours, too."

Karkat tensed up, but he didn't move away. "Are you sure about that? I really, REALLY don't want to fucking drop our wriggler on its head or some shit like that." He laughed nervously.

Dave snickered. "You'll be fine. Just position your arms like mine and hold her firm and gentle. There ya go, like that."

 _Holy shit, I'm doing it,_ Karkat thought to himself, _I'm holding her._ He inspected her little face as she continued resting. Karkat couldn't help but note that she did seem like a good blend of their physical traits. Her hair was definitely troll hair, as it was coarse and yet strangely soft like his own and he could see two little nubby horns sticking out. She also appeared to have troll claws and teeth, the latter only visible when her mouth was open since they were not quite as big as a regular troll's. However, she had Dave's red eyes and albino skin, and her anatomy resembled that of human offspring, albeit a bit smaller due to her being half wriggler.

"She's…beautiful, i-isn't she?" Karkat stammered. "She has a nice mix of human and troll features, doesn't she?" He inhaled deeply, after realizing he had been holding in his breath, and it faltered slightly as if he was having trouble breathing.

Dave tilted his head and squinted at Karkat's face. "Dude, are…are _you tearing up_?"

Karkat shook his head, but he sniffled a little bit as he started to blather away. "No, no, no! I'm fine! I'm just, just…really happy. She looks so precious and she's healthy and, well,…shit Dave she's ours!"

Karkat looked up at Dave, and saw he was starting to snivel as well, a few drops falling down his cheeks. He brought up his arm in an attempt to wipe his eyes and cover up his tears of joy. "Fuck, Kitkat, you got me falling apart, too. It's been forever since I've been such an emotional wreck." He leaned over and planted a kiss to his forehead, placing an arm around his shoulders, hugging him. "But there's no other two people in the world I'd rather be weeping like a sucker over than you two."

Before Karkat could respond, he felt movement inside the blanket burrito he held. The little baby-wriggler was finally wide awake, and was eyeing her parents curiously with her big, crimson eyes. She opened her mouth and gave out a loud squeak.

Dave sniffed. "Dang, that's fucking adorable, dude." He booped her little nose with his pinky, and she smiled up at him, making a sweet trilling sound. He smiled back. "She's really something, huh?"

Karkat sighed. "Well, it's been an hour since she's been born, and _she_ really needs a goddamn name. Still no fucking ideas? I know I don't have any."

Dave thought for a moment. "Mmmmm, I don't know, Karkat. I was hoping that when she woke up I could like maybe get a better grasp of her personality? So I could think of the perfect name for her. But, so far, I'm still at a loss. No names really popping at me right now."

"Well, no names stand out for me either. I never thought I'd get to name a wriggler, and my own for god's sake."

"Yeah, word." Dave observed the child a bit more, as she struggled to escape the confines of her blanket. It was fun to watch her gnaw at the comforter, kick out her feet slowly, and paw at the inside of it. She was a frisky little guy.

"Oh! How about M.C?" He suggested.

"M.C? Isn't that another word for a slam poet?"

"Yeah. But for instance, if she were to take my last name, not saying she has to though, her full name would be _M.C Strider_! Wouldn't that be fucking cool? She'd be like hella ready to start dropping sick beats."

Karkat snorted. "As fucking if! I shouldn't have to say this, especially to you of all people, but forcing our wriggler to take part in an activity she may or not enjoy could emotionally scare her. Seriously, she doesn't need the damn pressure."

Dave pondered it. "Yeah, I guess you're right. Lord knows I didn't enjoy having standards forced on me. But I got nothing else name-wise."

Karkat groaned. He looked down at the unnamed child, and started petting her hair to make her calm down. Damn, she was antsy. "Ya know, that word M.C? It reminded me of a name I've heard before, in one of my novels. This one female troll who was such a badass warrior."

He turned back to his matesprit and continued. "She was from one of my all-time favorite characters because of how she was able to fight her way up the ranks, survive through combat, and find the kismesis of her dreams in a troll she thought was her enemy. She was able to live a full, Atlernian live in relative comfort despite being a low-blood."

Dave studied his expression before replying. "And what was her name?"

"Misene. Misene Joster."

Strider seemed to consider it, first staring at Karkat, and then at the wriggler who was now chewing harmlessly at Karkat's thumb. She purred even louder when he glanced at her.

"Hmmmmm, sure why not."

Karkat raised an eyebrow in question. "Really? You have no problem naming our troll baby after a character in one of my cheesy romance novels?!"

Dave shrugged. "It sounds like it was well-written. Or at least interesting. Plus it's a rad name. Misene Strider,…or Vantas."

Karkat smiled. "Fuck yeah! Misene Strider, Conquerer of Planets and Terror of the Atlernian Fleet!"

Dave grimaced. "Let's take it easy there, Kitkat. Remember, no high standards."

He nodded. "Right. Anyway, let's feed this little bastard one more time before we go to bed."

The troll handed the baby to Dave before walking over to a table across the room, where a bowl of mashed grubs and fruits waited. As Karkat brought it back to the bed, he could see Dave laying Misene down on the bed so she could try to crawl around. She was very good at it too, being able to scamper after the albino's fingers as he waggled them out of her reach.

When Karkat rested down next to her to spoon feed her, Dave cleared his throat.

"Even though I get we shouldn't give Misene the wrong idea about anything, do you think it would be so wrong if we just kinda nicknamed her M.C?"

"Sure, why not?"

Dave grinned, and both parents knew in that instant that having this little miracle was one of the better choices they had made in centuries. What could go wrong?


End file.
